Spicer, UAL, China


Sean Spicer doubled down on his apologies for making Hitler comments in a press conference. Aides report he sent a spiral-sliced Heavenly Ham to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum. “I’m sure they enjoyed it. Everyone likes a ham at Easter.”
Meanwhile the boss declined the annual White House Passover Seder. It was hosted without him. This special seder recalls the Exodus of the Jewish people from Egypt. We assume this sounded a little to much like immigration, and well, you know how Donny hates immigrants. Especially from the Middle East.
So, Donald bags an event at the White House that would have further solidified his ties to American Jews? Jared Kushner must be thrilled.

Hey, that looks like my healthcare plan

Speaker Paul Ryan is learning a lesson from the fine customer support over at United Airlines. He wants to do to your healthcare what the airline did to their customer. Now Donald Trump is stepping into the fray, warning Democrats to get on board or else. Or else what? The healthcare plan can’t get any worse. And neither can the Democrats.

I’ve Always Loved China

The Donald bonded bigly with China this week, which proves there is no plan in this administration. Donald Trump is winging it as only an ADHD can truly understand. Months on the campaign trail blaming China for trade deficits and lost jobs are all forgotten. We are not a war with Eurasia anymore. Sean Spicer will be working feverishly to spin this one. And we wonder if Donald Trump just got conned.